Imaginary Trolls?

For once, I'm actually writing a post about being a writer! More specifically, I'm addressing this apparent issue of "Bully Reviewers". Strangely enough, I'm going to put forth an opinion that may not be very popular amongst my peers. But that's what writers do, right? We put our necks on the chopping block, we hand the world an axe, then cross our fingers and smile pretty.

For those not entirely aware of the situation, I'll sum it up. Allegedly, there are "careerist reviewers" on Amazon and Goodreads, who downrate books by the dozens, and post terrible, insulting things about the authors (specifically, indie-authors). These authors then lash back, and then get blacklisted by this group; labelled as an "Author Behaving Badly".

Ok, so they have their websites, and teams of reviewers on various forums, etc, etc, etc.

...and who is our Hulk? The absolutely sensational Anne Rice! Defender of the indies! Champion of the literary realm, and my personal idol!

Now for the unpopular part... I actually disagree with Anne Rice.

Granted, I haven't gone through and read EVERY accused "bully reviewer" post, and if the accusations are true, then yes, they're terrible trolls. I've heard that they make personal attacks towards the author rather than the book. I've heard they downvote droves of indie books without even reading them.

All of those things would be cruel if they were true. However, in the examples I've been shown, that wasn't the case. The most recent of which was a reviewer named Nenia Campbell. She has apparently been flagged by a group; "Stop the Goodreads Bullies". They labeled her a "Carpet Bomber", and posted a picture of a slew of 1 Star ratings from this woman. So, out of sadistic curiosity, I went to check out some of her scathing reviews.

Okay, yes, she has written a ridiculous number of reviews (who can read a dozen books in a day? Really.) Yes, most of them are 1-Star reviews. HOWEVER! All of her negative reviews are well-written, they are not personal attacks on an author, and she even backs up her negative remarks with quotes from the book, indicating the areas that grated on her. In fact, the one time I saw her even mention the author directly, it was to apologize for giving a bad review, and ended with "it's not for me".

And here's the real kicker; she's an indie author herself! Really? We're making the assumption that she's a bully who targets indie authors? Come on, people.

These are the bullies and trolls I was warned about? My initial thought was, "maybe she's just very particular and difficult to please". But even that's not the case. She's rated thousands of books with 5 Stars, she just didn't write reviews for them. Apparently, she primarily writes reviews for books she hates (save for a rare few exceptions).

Maybe that's not nice. It certainly doesn't follow the adage of "if you can't say something nice...", but what did you expect? You wrote a book, sent it out to the world and ASKED people to give their opinion. This is hers. It really is that simple.

Now, I may be bias on several levels. First, the very few reviews I've received so far have been very positive. I have yet to be subjected to the strident punch of a lone star. Second, I believe I share Ms. Campbell's cynical sense of humor.

Really. As harsh as her reviews are, they are quite funny and entertaining. This may also be the reason she only reviews books that she dislikes. Perhaps it is fun for her, and that's fine.

Here's the thing, we are authors. We write books, and hope people enjoy them. We do not, however, have the luxury of saying "Tell me what you think, but only if you think I'm awesome".

Seriously, if my book is awesome, tell me it's awesome. Shout it to the world. If my book stinks, you are also free to say so. I am keenly aware of the fact that my story and/or my writing style is not for everyone. There are people that will hate it. Will their reviews damage my fragile indie sales? Absolutely! Without some Five-Star padding, it will most likely crush me as an author. But then, perhaps I should have written a better book.

As a quick footnote, let me repeat that IF the accusations are true, then I wholeheartedly agree and stand by the victims of these bullies. I know that the internet is rampant with consequence-free trolls, and that sucks. All I'm saying, is that I haven't personally seen evidence of bullying in book reviews; certainly not with Nenia Campbell.

Beautiful Tragic

There is beauty in tragedy.

Tragedy is a willow tree dissolving back to the earth. Of course, there are the benefits that it will bring to the soil. Emerald blades of grass will one day grow in its place. They will paint the landscape with flowers of a thousand colors, and feed a forest of life. However, I'm not talking about the "circle of life".

I believe there is something beautiful in the death of the willow itself. Regardless of the radiance of a life, only when it fades, can we see its real value. Only in loss, in those darkened rooms of grief, do we discover where true light exists.

Remembrance pours out from a passing soul. It rekindles our lives. One by one, ribbons of color find their way into our memories. They move us backwards in time, reminding us of all those moments that somehow slid together like drops of rain on a window, drawing out the long line of our years.

This is the final gift given to us by every soul as they slip from our lives. As they fade away into morning light, they give us back the texture of life. They trace those individual moments that we would otherwise have forgotten. As smooth or as jagged as the days to come may be, for a short time, they will be real again. They will be mountainous, they will be blinding, and they will be real.

Death is no less beautiful than life. It is the edge of a diamond. It is the last page of a novel. It is a frame that defines the canvas. It is not a mistake, or a flawed design that ends life. It is a purposeful conclusion that makes us rare and irreplaceable.

The Sum of Parts

While working on a particular bit of writing, a conversation arose between two characters. While, in writing, that conversation has to flow naturally, I wanted to put down the basic premise of it here, without such a restriction.

At its core, the pearl of the concept is this: There is energy all around us. Yes, all you science buffs can make unimpressed assertions that "of course there is. This isn't news." So let me explain a bit more.

We know of all kinds of energy. There's kinetic, light, heat, magnetic even "potential" energy. What I'm saying is that there is something more; something we haven't quite nailed down yet.

So where's my proof? Art (or anything that might be considered art). What makes a song a song? A jackhammer has rhythm. Car engines have tone. So what is it in music that makes us feel something? What about paintings? How can simple colors and shapes on canvas express and evoke emotion?

While I'm at it, what makes a person more than just their cells? You're made up of a genome sequence and piles of organic matter, sure. But what's the extra, unseen spark that creates a human being?

Let me go one step further. What is confidence? Why can we perform amazing feats simply because people believe in us? Or, conversely, why do we feel so terrible when people insult us? What is that sense of "something missing" when we're hurt? And why do we become foul and seek to bring others down when we're in those dark places?

Science has proven that energy cannot be created or destroyed. It can be altered, manipulated and directed, but we cannot create new energy. This is exceptionally interesting when we consider that the whole of the universe is made of nothing more than energy.

So! How is it then, that every day, people are creating things that are somehow more than the sum of their parts? It may be undefinable, but there is undoubtedly something more to a sculpture than just stone. There's certainly more to a person than just cells and chemical memories.

All poetry aside, that unidentified "something" has to come from somewhere.

We can't always see it, but we are radiant beings. A luminous energy radiates from all living things. We can infuse it into our work. We can pour it into another person, or we can sap it away and leave them feeling depressed and drained. It is an endless exchange in which we're all connected.

Once you're aware of this, you can sense it everywhere you go. Watch conversations and try to identify where the energy is going. Whose presence dominates a room? Why? How do they feel when all eyes are on them? How do you feel?

There is something always moving and shifting in the unseen corners of our lives. You are glowing with a universal light. It rises from you like scent from a rose. It is an unmatched essence that has the power to change the universe. Be proud, and use it with care.

Our Songs Inside

My mother once repeated a quote to me that really had a profound impact on me.

"Do not die with your music still in you."
~ Dr. Wayne Dyer

For me, the quote was slightly inspiring, and hugely terrifying. Of course, I was young at the time. I had the mentality that I would live forever. This statement, however, set fire and awakened that small lump of mortality in me.

I have all of these ideas, all these theories, and all these stories locked away in my mind. I've prattled them out to a handful of people, but none I would trust with retelling them. If I were to die tomorrow, I would take those stories to my grave. They would be lost forever, having never been told.

Now I'm not saying something ridiculous like "YOLO!" I do not believe you should live as if there's no tomorrow, because, well, tomorrow has had a fairly solid track record so far. I wouldn't bet against it.

We each came into this world with something beautiful, or powerful or just plain brilliant inside of us. The whole point of being here is to deliver that package; to share it with others. If you die, having never told your story, it will be the greatest tragedy of your life, and a terrible loss to the world.

The world is getting darker, and people have begun to cling to their internal lights. They huddle around them, for fear of being exposed or ridiculed. Possibly they just fear letting go of the only bit of warmth they've ever had. But if you're going to clutch it forever, then bury it in the ground with your remains, then what were you doing here in the first place.

I'll wrap this up by leaving you with another quote, along the same lines.

"A ship in harbor is safe, but that is not what ships are built for."
~ John Augustus Shedd